Bridgend Suicide Link Found

Funny story written by carina-eta

Tuesday, 19 February 2008

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The tragic glut of suicides sweeping across the little Welsh hamlet of Bridgend doesn't seem to be slowing down, with another teenage suicide today. A journalist is so concerned that he has put up a £5,000 reward for any information revealing a link between the deaths.

So far 3,062 people have come forward with several valid links.

  1. The suicides have all happened in Bridgend.
  2. They all involve teenagers.
  3. They have all resulted in death.
  4. Everyone who has come forward could do with £5,000.

Today Bridgend police have imposed a curfew on all teenagers and blockades have been installed in nearby woods.

Posters advertising Childline (0800 1111), Papyrus (01282 432555) and the Samaritans (01656 662333) have been nailed to every tree, in an effort to prevent more tragic deaths.

John Barrowman has also promised that his Torchwood team will continue to investigate the deaths, although, once again, he denied any involvement in the sudden unexplained sci-fi like tragedies.

In the meantime, young people feeling suicidal are urged to seek help via the above numbers and to avoid watching Torchwood.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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