The Latest government proposal is to get smokers to hold a 'Licence to Smoke' Permit. Only £10 per year! No one would be able to buy cigarettes without the permit, under the idea proposed by Health England.
Its chairman, Prof. Julian Le Grand, himself a reformed smoker, told In Seine News that the scheme would make a big difference to the number of people giving up smoking; They would become angrier for starters… and quite impecunious too!
Carina E a lifelong smoker from the frozen north who HAS to smoke in order to keep warm described the proposal as "an outrageous form of stealth tax - we already pay over £3 tax on a packet of fags already",
Professor Le Grand, a former adviser to ex-PM Tony Blair, said cash raised by the proposed scheme would go to the NHS.
"That's a good one! If the tax on cigarettes alone actually went to the NHS (like we're told it does) we'd have the best Health Service in the world. There's no need for a Licence to smoke. Why pick on smokers all the time? Why not have a Licence to Drink? A Licence to Take Drugs? A Licence to Crap? Where to you draw the line?"
Carina began to cough violently and added;
"I might be dead before this comes in! Mind you have you noticed the speed with which any revenue-making plan gets implemented? Politicians are all liars - pay that to the NHS!"