James Blunt issues rhyming slang writ

Funny story written by Everyman

Friday, 4 January 2008

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James Blunt is the centre of rhyming slang controversy

James Blunt has hit back at his many critics by applying to the courts to make it illegal to use his name in rhyming slang.

In a statement issued outside the High Court, Blunt said: "I first discussed the fact that my name was being abused by people with my good friend Tom Hanks, who has had similar problems. Of course, since the success of actress Hilary Swank his name problems have disappeared - although he continues to have many other issues."

As of today anybody heard calling someone a "complete James" will be breaking the law and may be imprisoned under the Government's anti-terrorism measures and held for forty two days without charge.

A civil liberty group suggested that this might be "publicity stunt", but then retracted the comment fearing that such a phrase might fall foul of the new ruling.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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