Written by queen mudder

Thursday, 28 June 2007

image for Bandar suspected over baffling London 'suicide' of Mossad spook
Ashraf Marwan in one of his many disguises

Mayfair, London - (Ass Mess): London's inexplicable suicide season is in full swing today with the news that Saudi Arabian slush fund libertine Prince Bandar may be a relieved man after the Mossad son-in-law of former Egyptian president Gamal Abdel Nasser was found dead outside his London flat in unexplained circumstances.

Ashraf Marwan, a 62 year old financier, wheeler-dealer and former Chelsea Football Club shareholder was found crumpled on the road under his Carlton House Terrace fourth floor flat.

He was pronounced dead at the scene.

"He had that classic depressed look of a typical suicider when we found him," a police spokesman said from the scene today, "but then, he was already dead."

Marwarn had lead a colorful life ever since being accused of being an Egyptian/Israeli/Soviet triple agent who had been suspected of tipping off the Israelis about the start of the Yom Kippur war in 1973.

Known friends and associates spoke of their shock and disbelief today after hearing about the tragedy.

Saudi arms dealer Adnan Khashoggi said "Gosh!" in a puzzled but relieved looking way before disappearing into his roller and speeding off away from reporters.

Former Chelsea FC chairman Ken Bates said "Blimmin' heck!" and Harrabs storekeeper Mohammed Fired said something similar but with more expletives deleted.

Meanwhile in Tripoli, Libya Colonel Gaddafy said he wasn't really surprised because his best guess was that Marwan was the turncoat Mossad spook who had framed Libyan Al-Megrahi for the Lockerbie bombing.

"Maybe Bandar fixed this," were his final comments.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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