Brits Celebrate Top Award!

Funny story written by Stylo

Saturday, 19 May 2007

image for Brits Celebrate Top Award!
Johnny Vegas relaxes in his Shropshire home.

English people are the lardiest in Europe - it's a fact!

A survey completed last week found that compared to our European neighbours, we scored highest in thigh flab, pot-belliedness and neck girth.

Two average people from each of the competing countries were chosen for the survey; Germany picked two supermodels, Spain sent in the measurements for a hat-stand and a deck-chair, and France offered seven year-old Siamese twins with a combined eating disorder.

Asked why England had chosen Vanessa Feltz and Johnny Vegas for the survey, a spokesman replied, "England wins sod all these days, so it will be a real boost to national morale to come top at something for once."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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