Rising Tides Inundate Welsh Historic Sites

Written by Pointer

Tuesday, 13 February 2007

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Rising tides threaten historic drunk's historic sites

Global warming seems to have already hit the southwestern shore of the English Island.Beachcomber extraordinaire Ringo Starr reported to the Wales' Blowhole that historic sites along the Welsh coast are in serious danger since the unusually high tides.

"Pretty soon," Ringo quipped, "We'll all be living in a Yellow Submarine!"

More serious scientific experts like Welchman Caruthers Ph.D. underscored the danger to the historic locations: "Dooown the bitch 'ere you ken see the pub where Dylan Thomas got drunk 'afore 'ritin' The Green Fern. This pub 'ere is where Welsh Rarebit was first developed by Chef "Bugsy" Malone. That big house on the hill is where Thomas wrote "A Child's Christmas", a narrative masterpiece about his first Christmas binge. It was in the tiny little cottage down the beach that Thomas would visit his dyin' drunk of a dad and where he wrote: "Do Not Go Gentle" and tied on a doozy in the pub next door."

Dr Caruthers warned the world: "Wales may be the first to lose the historic sites due to global warming but you're next world! Are ya' ready to see drowned all of the precious sites of your native artistic inebriates?"

In response to the Welsh experience, The Hamptons, LI, USA have begun planning to build levees to protect alcoholic Abstract Expressionist genius Jackson Pollack's beach front studio.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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