Fears of foot and mouth (taken from Cilybebyll Daily News)

Written by hitchicker

Monday, 12 February 2007

image for Fears of foot and mouth (taken from Cilybebyll Daily News)
The sheep eyeing up the Competition

Ann Summers in the Welsh farming village of Cilybebyll has this week declared its profits up by 110% from sales of blow up sheep as its citizens are preparing for the worse as local farmer Dremidydd Talyessin discovered one of his sheep with its foot in its mouth which has sparked fears that the dreaded foot and mouth epidemic may hit the UK.

The new swept through the small Village as quick as one of the many cullings which took place in 2001, when Dremidydd passed the news onto local sheep spotter and the village's only newsagent owner, Cymry Talyessin.

All of the Cilybebyll`s residents who made the daily trip down to the newsagents were extremely worried that they wouldn`t be getting any sexual intercourse for sometime if an epidemic broke out rushed down to the local Ann Summers to be the first in line for the now sold out stock of white blow up sheep. A top level Ann Summers employee was quoted as saying;

"We have been inundated with requests for white blow up sheep, which I can confirm they are now fully sold out, though we do have a few black sheep left. This range doesn`t seem to be selling as well as out white range, we feel this could be down to the subconscious sheep racism that is rift in Wales"

Ann Summers staff are set to be greeted by long queues tomorrow morning as people scramble to get there hands on the final stock of black blow up sheep, which cost a mere 22 Welsh pennies, and with many activities planned it set to be a great day for all sheep hunters.

"We expect to sell the final few blow up sheep tomorrow morning, to keep out customers happy while they wait we shall be putting on several events such as best fancy dress sheep person, we shall be doing a blow the sheep race and to top the day of we are going to be having a real life farmer show our customers how to keep their sheep happy. Its set to be a sheeptastic time" said the sheepish Ann Summer employee.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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