Written by humanoid

Wednesday, 28 June 2017

image for Eleanor Rigby was caught shopping at thrift store

Rochdale- Savoring the huge amount of cheap goods and the Salvation Army's desires to be rid of the old merchandise, Eleanor Rigby, spent the afternoon digging through piles of musky items looking for bargains.

Store employees, at the Salvation Army store on Providence House, 2 High St, Rochdale, who are also volunteer dosser's, were surprised to see Rigby shopping at the hand-me-down store.

Manager, Andy Capp, says Rigby used to be a regular customer before hearing her name on a famous song. "Glad to see her back," says Capp.

She was seen purchasing a pile of used, knockoff knickers, a broken umbrella, a pair of red pumps, some oversized brassieres, dirty glassware and bootleg DVDs.

She informed the cashier that she was doing her Christmas shopping early, to treat her relatives and friends to some gifts.

"I guess she's set on her ways, you can't teach an old dog new tricks," says Margaret McOxenbauls, store cashier.

When reached for comment, at her home, she told a story of being at the mercy of a gang of neighborhood kids who regularly hurl insults at her for birthday gifts they received the previous year.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
50 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more