Aristocratic nutter on the lose in La La Land

Funny story written by humanoid

Tuesday, 16 May 2017


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Aristocratic nutter on the lose in La La Land
Evidence of sexual experiments and manky bestiality.

Richard John Frankenstein, 7th Earl of Lucan and renowned Satanist, is being sought by police on suspicion of crimes against nature.

Authorities believe he mixed the genes of a zoo gorilla, his daughter, and cadavers to create two living abominations, with his daughter serving as a surrogate mother.

"All living things came from a basic origin and we must embrace all living brethren as our equal," famous quote by Richard John Frankenstein.

On the evening of 7 May 2017, the gorilla's nanny, Sandra Rivett, was found unconscious in the basement of the Frankenstein family home.

The police suspect the nanny caught Frankenstein's daughter, Lady Esmeralda, engaged in a sex act with the gorilla. Rivett then threatened to contact the authorities if she wasn't given a pay raise, at which moment it is believed Esmeralda attacked her with a rusty frying pan.

A witness heard yelling and screams coming from the Frankenstein home, "Here's your payment you desperate hag, take it with pride," followed by screams, "Please forgive me my Lady, I have no more desires for money." A gorilla was heard grunting excitedly in the background.

"They were a deranged family lacking Christian values," says peeler, Sir Michael Adebowale.

Upon further investigation a laboratory was found where Frankenstein conducted experiments inseminating his daughter using gorilla semen in a failed attempt to create a hybrid.

From a family portrait found in his room, it is believed he had some success with his experiments.

The police believe Frankenstein unearthed graves at the local Jewish cementary to obtain fresh, kosher cadavers.

Professor Welsh Shortfellow from the University says Frankenstein used genetic material from dead and living bodies to piece together embryos he inserted into his daughter's womb after her menstruation.

Afterwards, her naked body was strapped to a wall with the help of the gorilla where she was whipped and electrocuted during various attempts to produce life within the implanted embryos.

A warrant for Frankesteins arrest was issued, and the police is asking for the public's help in locating his whereabouts.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more