Written by Mike Peril

Thursday, 6 April 2017

image for "Out of Office Assistant" Turns on its Employee
Santorelli is Victim of Email Mishap

Fort Lee, NJ - Kevin Santorelli had no idea he would be fired until the day he returned to work after being on family medical leave. While taking care of his mother, and attending church each day, he turned on his "out of office assistant" email feature to alert his employer's customers about his absence. But by his account, his out of office assistant turned on him.

According to Santorelli, the fairly benign message of "I'm sorry to be out for my mother" turned into "I'm sorry I'm out you mother" and the phrase "I will return as soon as I can" turned into "I will return soon you ass".

The employer fired Santorelli. At his union's urging, Santorelli immediately filed a charge with the NLRB. Now Santorelli reports he is steering clear of sending any emails.

Responding to one reporter, who sought to verify the story, Santorelli allegedly stated in a rage, "It was my spell check you mother-f*ing ass."

The NLRB matter is still pending but can be dismissed if the employer rehires Santorelli and makes a large settlement payment. The employer is considering the move to avoid escalating legal costs.

For updates contact mike_peril@aol.com.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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