Plastic bag use has dropped in the UK after the 5p charge was brought in. Bag use has dropped by 6 billion causing environmental campaigners everywhere to celebrate by having polystyrene based bonfires.
But a different side to the decrease of plastic bag use has come to light. There has been a explosion in unexpected pregnancies in poorer areas around the UK.
Mike Spratt of the National Institute Of Intriguing Co-incidences said;
It's a intriguing co-incidence that's for sure. Something that our institute will be looking into. After all that is our job.
He was right. Standing at a bus stop we saw notorious father of 67 Alex Scally and we asked him what he thought to try and pad out this piece a bit. We also tried to score some blow but he was all out.
You see mate since the government started charging for Johnnies everyone bin using plastic bags innit? So now's they charging for them what are peoples supposed to use? Fucking bin bags? No dicks that big mate, except mine. My sister has become preggers six times since they brought in the charge and that's bang out of order that is.
Mystery solved. But we had to wonder if his sister had several wombs because if she didn't six pregnancies in six months was biologically impossible.