In the last few days, news has broken regarding the unprecedented level of phone tapping occuring in the UK. As many as 1 in every 3,000,000 phones is, as I speak, being tapped.
Roger Thebulus Smythe, former MI5 communications expert, shared with us some information regarding phone tapping:
"It happens every minute of every day. Without a doubt someone you have met in your life may, or may not, know someone whose phone is being tapped. I'd go as far as to say that about one in three million people in the UK is having their phone tapped as we speak. Some of the information gleaned will be highly valuable to anyone wanting to know, for example, how many pizzas that person orders, what his or her mum thinks of the weather, and how there hardly ever seems to be anything good on TV these days. Highly valuable, useful information"
The latest phone tapping scandal involves Mimsy Pepps of Kettering who has been scandalised in the "red-top" newspapers with suggestions that she's been having an affair with a local binman who once had lunch across from a guy who looked like Prince Charles. Mrs Pepps was quoted earlier this week saying:
"It's bloody ridiculous, that's what it is! I haven't been having an affair with anyone and I don't even know this Reg Varmint guy who I'm supposed to have 'done it with'. And I don't see what difference it makes whether he's a bin man or not!"
Mr Smythe commented on this particular case:
"This kind of salacious gossip is important and integral to our society, and without it we simply couldn't function correctly. The Queen herself accepts this which is why she doesn't care that every phone she has is tapped by seven different agencies - it's just part of the job for her."
In more recent news, it has been alledged by an anonymous source who claims to have access to the Mimsy Pepps phone recording, that what she had actually said was:
"Oh god, I was annoyed. I got home and the kids had spread rubbish everywhere. I had to pick up the bin and cart it around the whole house: the kitchen, the landing, even on the stairs. I wouldn't mind but the carpet on the stairs is shag and it's a pain in the arse to get stains out."
