United Airlines Criticized for Marketing Practices.

Funny story written by Jen A. Taylia

Sunday, 25 April 2004

image for United Airlines Criticized for Marketing Practices.
Grandma Arnold shares, "Air Hostess was absolutely Lovely".

United Airlines have been criticized today for their recent "Visit Grandkids for $150 or less" telephone marketing campaign.

The offer, only available to seniors, has come under fire after complaints from family members who say that they end up carrying the real burden of cost.

"Cheap tickets of dubious value." is what one household told reporters.

United spokesman, Bo Ing, refuted the claims,

"We take offense at the inference that we are taking advantage of seniors. We are merely calling them and promising them that we can give them a flight for $150 or less. Take Beth Arnold for example. Read her testimonial on our website."

We did. Beth was very happy to have been able to fly from Denver to Phoenix and visit Gale and Helen, her daughters 6 week old twins.

A follow up call to her family, however, revealed a different story..

"Yes, they gave her a Denver / Phoenix return ticket for $137, but she lives in bloody Kansas".

Eldest son Dennis relates the unhappy tale.

"The day before her 5.45AM flight I took the day off work and drove from my home in Colorado Springs to pick her up in Kansas, then all the way to Denver where we stayed in a hotel near the airport."

"After seeing her safely to the terminal at 4AM I drove back home to catch some rest. The next evening I headed out to collect her from her midnight arrival and we checked back into the hotel then I dropped her off in Kansas the following day. I then drove home and due to heavy traffic completely missed my favorite show, Alias"

When asked what annoyed him most about the ordeal he shared, "I was furious that mom paid United a $45 fuel surcharge in Phoenix considering I put 800 f**king miles on my new Jeep."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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