Man Drains Life Savings To Buy £35,000 Lexus For School Reunion

Funny story written by Adrian Booth

Thursday, 22 May 2014

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A man has taken all of his life savings and used them to buy a £35,000 Lexus in preparation for his secondary school reunion.

Timothy Davis felt inadequate on hearing from an organiser at the school that many of his former classmates had become very successful in life. There was Jonathan Adams, always a hit with the girls, always scoring high grades, and universally admired by everyone on the playground, who had successfully built a law firm upon leaving university. There was Barry Lennon, who used to bully Timothy by throwing him into the school bins during break time. Barry went onto become a highly successful athlete and now owns 3 Ferraris, 2 Aston Martins and a 2 floor penthouse in Knightsbridge, London.

Despite achieving high grades, and being somewhat of a nerd, Timothy didn't exactly display any ambition. He still lives with his parents, drives a 2nd hand Ford Escort and works full time in customer support for Natwest, earning £23,000 a year.

"Seeing as I've been living at home for the past 15 years since school ended, I've managed to save up this money by refusing to pay rent. I knew I'd need it someday, and I know that now would be the right time to spend it", said Timothy as he stroked his new Lexus GS Hybrid.

This correspondent asked Timothy whether he'd be using the Lexus much after the reunion.

"I'll probably only use this once. My work is 10 minutes walk and I rarely drive anyway. But I can't wait to see the look on Barry Lennon's face when he sees me arrive in this envy machine. £35,000 well spent."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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