A spaceship is about to embark on one of the most technologically advanced missions ever attempted - by smashing down on a bankrupt Comet store in Barnsley at 24,600mph.
Bungling Beagle 2 professor Colin Pillinger is to supervise the practice run for the Rosetta spacecraft.
The Professor, with classic comedy sideburns, told reporters: "Nasa wants to make sure this project cocks up big time for test purposes, and I'm the perfect man for cock ups!
"I supervised a multi million pound catastrophic Mars probe landing in 2003. The sponsors and government lost big time.
"I think somebody on my team put a decimal point in the wrong place or something. I dunno, I don't do maths, I'm a chemist."
