Lib Dem 'inappropriate conduct' victim says nine other women 'involved' in case

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Tuesday, 26 February 2013


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Woman showing the aftereffects of an unwanted Lord Rennard hug.

A woman at the centre of the inappropriate conduct case has said that she believes that there are nine other women involved in the case. It also emerged today that both Nick Clegg and David Cameron knew of the accusations.

In a statement released from the Liberals HQ Clegg said. "I had heard some rumors but I chose to look the other way. I know that Mr Cameron had heard rumors about Jimmy Savile and several senior members of his party and he chose to ignore them and protect those involved. Just has he continues to deny any knowledge of phone hacking."

When asked if he had read Mr Clegg's statement the Prime Minister replied "I didn't need to read it I was able to listen in as he dictated it to his secretary. Look what we have here are two different things. The Savile stuff was a long time ago and it involved children. Children should be seen and not heard and most of the time when they are heard they are lying. Grown women do tell the truth and that is why they should be kept home in their kitchens where they can only gossip with each other and not cause any trouble."

Vince Cable attempted to put the blame for the behavior on the BBC:

"In the 1980s the BBC made the series ''Allo 'Allo' in which a portly balding man was shown to be irresistible to women and gay men. Naturally Chris took this to heart and thought the same applied to him even moreso after a mix up with Simon Hughes and a cigar at the Christmas Party. It is another reason why we and our Conservative partners want to destroy the BBC."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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