Isle of Wight News - Garlic Festival's latest event

Funny story written by IainB

Wednesday, 6 June 2012

image for Isle of Wight News - Garlic Festival's latest event
If the garlic runs out, any fruit can be used

The world famous Isle of Wight Garlic Festival is looking for the country's Garlicks to come forward and be recognised.

"We've been running the Garlic Festival for something like fifteen hundred years," said event organiser, Carl Garlick. "We felt it was time for something different."

There are several thousand people with the surname Garlick in the UK, and the Garlic Festival committee want as many of them to come to the island for the event this year.

"We're going to hold a Garlick of Garlicks at the Garlic Gala," said Garlick. "If your surname is Garlick, you can take part."

All people need to do is bring a photo-ID and they can enter.

"It's like a Beauty Pageant," said Garlick. "But without the beauty. Or the pageant, come to think of it."

The exact format for the Garlick of Garlicks is yet to be determined, but will probably involve getting all the Garlicks up on a stage and the crowd can throw garlic bulbs at the Garlick that they want to be crowned Garlick of Garlicks.

"There will definitely be a trophy," said Garlick. "We've sourced that from the Ventnor Trophy and Tackle shop in Newport."

There is no need to pre-book an appearance, event organisers are hoping that sufficient Garlicks will turn up.

"If there's just me," said Garlick, "then I guess I'll be winning the trophy."

The nearby Garlic Hotel is offering a ten percent discount on its room prices for anybody called Garlick who is coming for the event.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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