Written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

image for Coronation Chicken of the Seas* to be Queen's Diamond Jubilee dish
No spring chicken she...unlike Captain Schettino's Moldovan lap dancer friend

London - Pollo impagliato 'Schettino' - (Francesco) Schettino-style stuffed chicken - has been named the Duchess of Cornwall's Diamond Jubilee dish in a competition to feed her mother-in-law.

Camilla launched the cookery compy at the Nova Herod (!) College, in Swindon, Wilts today and told students to come up with a contemporary twist on an old favorite.

Her own culinary entry is a combination of the 1953 'coronation chicken' classic horror consisting of cold fowl cuts/mayonnaise/curry powder AND some potent, exotic Italian herbs said to have been a favorite at the Captain's table on the Costa Concordia....before she went down like the ExxonValdez.

The dish was served cold aboard the stricken pleasure cruiser's fine dining room just before a pesky iceberg jumped Titanic-style out of the balmy Mediterranean waters and pranged its hull.

A side-dish of grilled chicken-of-the-woods mushroom confit was served alongside in true Tuscan fashion.

Italian coastguards said today a Moldovan-registered blonde spring chicken lap dancer may have distracted the Captain's intention (sic) moments before the boat hit the rocks.

*With special thanks to Abel Rodriguez

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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