Conservative Party Conference to Generate £27.4m for Manchester

Funny story written by churchmouse

Sunday, 2 October 2011

image for Conservative Party Conference to Generate £27.4m for Manchester
Kylie covering the needle scars

It has been widely reported in the media (BBC, Telegraph, Manchester Evening News etc) that the current Conservative Party Conference will generate £27,000,000 for the local economy.

A total of 13,000 delegates will each spend up to four days in the city, much to the delight of cash-strapped local businesses.

At the end of the conference therefore, each delegate will have contributed an average of £2,107 during the course of the event.

Obviously, hotels don't come cheap, and each delegate would have paid around £200 per night to stay in the 'Venice of The North'. Then there is also the cost of food and drinks at perhaps £100 per person per day, and possibly another £100 to cover trams/taxis etc.

And what about a souvenir? Perhaps a silver plated 'I love that city up North where nobody voted for us' lapel badge at £250 a throw.

Some commentators have claimed that there may be some excesses on the part of the delegates. As with all of the above expenses taken into consideration, there is still a £500 shortfall for each one; Presumably taken up by 'entertainment' costs.

Still, Manchester's business community isn't complaining.

"I can make more money during those four days than I make all year." said Piccadilly based Gentleman's entertainer, Kylie Wetlegs.

"My dealer will be made up."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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