Written by Ellis Ian Fields

Wednesday, 21 September 2011

image for Duchess Of Cambridge Seeks Lucid Advice
Where's Ken?

While the Duchess of Cambridge is being tutored on the workings of British institutions to prepare her for a lifetime of royal duties, one expert is missing from her list of teachers.

Royal aides have revealed that specialists in the arts, Government and the media have been asked to visit St James's Palace to provide the duchess with one-to-one briefings on the Establishment.

However, she is reportedly disappointed that controversial academic and historian, Ken Lucid, has not being included in the list of tutors.

An insider said: "The Duchess is very keen to fill the gaps in her knowledge and she was hoping that Prof Lucid would be around to help her with the history of these islands and Europe.

"'I want Lucid!' She exclaimed only yesterday."

Prof Lucid, who has just accepted the Herodotus Chair of History at Hounslow University, was unavailable for comment today.

"He's down the pub with his media friends," said Mrs Lucid, 'the Empress.'

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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