CL Final - United Legend Nobby Stiles To Man Mark Lionel Messi?

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Friday, 27 May 2011

image for CL Final - United Legend Nobby Stiles To Man Mark Lionel Messi?
Nobby Will Probably Wear Contact Lenses In The Final

The retired Manchester United defender might seem at first glance to be a dubious choice to man mark Barcelona's diminutive Argentinian striker, but some sources are of the opinion that Nobby is all set to come out of retirement and operate as a sweeper in front of the defensive pairing of Vidic and Ferdinand.

It would be familiar territory for Stiles, as he performed in a similar role for England in the 1966 World Cup Finals, man marking Eusebio in the semi-final, and Franz Beckenbauer in the final, effectively marking both men out of each respective game.

With a bit of help from Bobby Charlton in the latter contest.

Stiles reprised that role when he man marked Eusebio in the 1968 European Cup Final between Manchester United and Benfica, again at Wembley, stifling the Portuguese genius throughout. Apart from the one occasion when Eusebio managed to slip his marker and bear down on United keeper Alex Stepney in a one on one scenario.

Thankfully for Nobby, Stepney pulled off a fantastic save at point blank range.

A former team mate of Nobby's told Skoob Sports News that Nobby would be equal to the task of man marking Lionel Messi.

"Messi won't be a problem for Nobby," the pal said. "Nobby never did have brilliant eyesight, and he's probably lost half a yard in pace, but he's dealt with tougher assignments than this before."

Which leaves Sir Alex Ferguson with a selection headache. He's going to have to relegate Ji Sung Park or Michael Carrick to the bench in order to accommodate Nobby Stiles.

More as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more