Pacquiao Wins But Ole Man Mosley Takes Him The Distance

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Sunday, 8 May 2011


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Don't You Be Lookin' At Me There Boy - I'll Whup Your Ass

Widely regarded as the best pound for pound fighter in the world, Manny Pacquiao, was taken the distance in Vegas by 39 year old Shane Mosley last night.

The venue was the MGM Grand Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada, and the proceedings got under way with rapper LL Cool J introducing Mosley to the ring...

Vegas bullshit at its best.

Then it got even better, or decidedly more crap, depending on how you look at it.

As Pacquiao, in a stroke of originality unseen since somebody cast John Wayne as a Roman centurion in 'The Greatest Story Ever Told' made his entrance to 'Eye Of The Tiger' by Survivor - the theme to Rocky III.

The ensuing fight was basically a bit of a snooze fest, with the crowd voicing their disapproval repeatedly, as people who have probably never been punched really hard in the face in their lives, jeered two seasoned fighters who have both probably been punched in the face really hard once too often.

Mosley never looked like he wanted to win the fight. Looking more like a man who simply wanted his jaw attached to the rest of his head, he managed to fend off his Philippino opponent until the third round, when he was caught by a quick right left combination which left him temporarily on his arse on the canvas, probably thinking:

'That fucking hurt. I think I'll have a rest for about eight seconds.'

As boxing's answer to the late Bruce Lee determinedly set about knocking his elder opponent's block off.

To Mosley's credit, he fended Paquaio off, even managing to drop him on his arse in round ten...

Even if it was more of a push than a punch.

Pacquaio pushed it in the final round, and Mosley duly fended him off - even threatening with a dangerous right hand...

But in the end - despite both combatants being battered and bruised, Pacquaio won this WBO World Welterweight title fight with a unanimous decision.

Although it did leave a sour taste in some spectators' mouths.

Because they didn't get to see a man knocked senseless.

Would that they would ever have the fortitude to enter such a formidable arena.

Mano a mano...


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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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