Famous hot-dog speed-eating champ freed from jail

Funny story written by shea lo

Sunday, 8 August 2010

image for Famous hot-dog speed-eating champ freed from jail

Takeru Kobayashi is a free man after a New York judge ruled to dismiss all charges against the skinny Japanese speed-eater accused of crashing a hot dog eating contest.

Human python Kobayashi holds records for eating:

63 hot dogs in 12 minutes
83 vegetarian dumplings in 8 minutes
58 bratwurst sausages in 10 minutes
4 lobster rolls in 10 minutes
17.7 pounds of cow brains in 15 minutes
20 pounds (9 kg) of rice balls in 30 minutes
17.7 pounds of cow brains in 15 minutes
20 pounds (9 kg) of rice balls in 30 minutes.

Standing on the court steps with his canny lawyer Ben Matlock, also a hot-dog lover, a jubilant Kobayashi said he was looking forward to downing a dozen Kobe steaks:

"Normal-size. This-a big", he gestured with his hands held wide apart when reporters asked how many steaks he planned to devour.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot