Written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 5 July 2010

image for Uruguay Out To Make A Killing Against Holland
Hey, Robben, let's go discuss it around the corner, amigo!

Uruguay football coach Oscar Tabarez has drawn up a cunning plan to stop Holland forward Arjen Robben in their World Cup semi-final in Cape Town on Tuesday.

According to my interpretation of what he was saying, he actually plans to kill him.

In an interview with the BBC, Sebastian Abreu, the hero of the shoot-out win over Ghana, said:

"Tabarez has been talking to us about Robben and how to stop a player like him.

"But it's always different when you are on the field We know how to do it, but whether the actual execution actually comes off is another thing."

Assassinations are commonplace in South America, but taking the life of a footballer merely because he is a faking, diving cheat, seems to be taking things a tad too far.

The Urugauyans are taking the World Cup very seriously, however. They know this is a great chance for them to win the trophy, but first they must stop Robben, and appear to be single-minded in the pursuit of this act.

Come on Uruguay!

Quotations in italics courtesy of BBC report: The original BBC story

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
65 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more