England beats Japan in friendly without even scoring one goal

Funny story written by Lady Godiva

Sunday, 30 May 2010

image for England beats Japan in friendly without even scoring one goal
Rooney 'All is fair in love and football'

You must admit that the England team are no suckers when it comes to winning games.

They managed to beat Japan in a recent 'friendly' 2 - 1 without even scoring ONE goal themselves.

Players on the England side ran circles around the Japanese players, confusing the daylights out of them, resulting in the Japanese side becoming totally disorientated.

Some England players took to pulling strange faces at the Japanese in an effort to further break down their concentration.

These tactics worked, resulting in the Japanese team actually scoring England's TWO goals, plus one of their own.

When interviewed afterwards, the Japanese captain was quoted as saying,

"We didn't know what had hit us. The England team literally ran circles around us. We were dizzy beyond belief and when they began making strange faces at us, as if they were 'possessed', we were definitely caught by surprise and lost all of our concentration on the game.

We will put in a formal complaint and ask for a re-match."

Rooney came back with, "All is fair in love and football. We were told in the dressing room to do everything we had to, to win this game but NOT TO STRAIN OURSELVES. We need all our energy and so on for the REAL games. It's called a 'friendly', but don't kid yourself. Once out on the pitch, 'friend' is NOT a word that exists. We DID everything we had too, with excellent results."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more