Scouser "Rooney" after throwing a tantrum and bunging his shoe at a Turkish dugout has been threatened with legal action by Niadidabok.
"Roon" is under contract with Nike and a Nike representative after seeing this display of uncontrolled aggro promptly informed "Roon" " that if he ever dare's to throw his shoes at a Turkish dugout again, they will sue him and force him to wear Lo-Teks!"
Rooney apologised immediately and explained his outburst through an English interpretor to Nike and the Turks (Only Scousers understand "Roon's" language, hence the necessity for an interpretor!)
"I just wanted to throw my fucking shoe at the bastard dugout, that's all man, it had nothing to do with being substituted. The fucking Turkish dugout was built for Turkish fucking midgets, I bashed my head, ruined my $200,00 hairstyle (what hair!) and threw my fucking shoe, that's all, I promise!"
Niadidabok accepted the apology, Turkish, Besiktas fans issued a "Fatwah" and Sir Alex told the world press, "so fucking what laddie, the lads emotional and that fucking dugout really was a wee tiny, thank God Edwin van de Sar wasn't substitute, long Dutch bastard, could have been a fatality!"