Written by Honest Lee

Saturday, 11 April 2009

image for Tiger disqualified from US Masters
Tigers spikes were too long

Tiger Woods, the no.1 golfer in the world, has been sensationally disqualified from the Masters.

Crowd favourite Woods has fallen fowl of the pernickety rules of golf and will not compete in Sundays final round. Rule 87(b)(iii)pararagraph 2 states, "the maximum length of the spikes in the shoes worn by the player must not exceed 7mm".

Eagle eyed officials spotted that Woods was looking slightly taller than usual and decided to perform a check on his spikes. Measuring too place behind closed doors and revealed that the spikes had an "average length of 7.21mm" and it was announced that "Tiger Woods has completed a round with illegal length spikes and thus we have no option but to disqualify him from the tournament".

This means that Woods will not be entitled to receive any money for competing in the tournament and was undeniably upset when we spoke to him. "I tried some knew shoes I got on the cheap but forgot about rule Rule 87(b)(iii) paragraph 2. It was a stupid error but I accept the punishment."He then joked,"I will have to bite the bullet and ask my wife for some more pocket money in future."

Woods denied that this was a planned move in light of the fact that he has never won a major when not leading after 54 holes. "Utter nonsense" was his reply.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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