Fabregas Has Hyperactive Salivary Glands Claims Wenger And Arsenal

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Thursday, 19 March 2009

image for Fabregas Has Hyperactive Salivary Glands Claims Wenger And Arsenal
Me Nice Spanish boy. But Me Spit On You. Then Hit You With Shiny Stick

Arsene Wenger and various executive suits at the Arsenal Desperates (Degenerates?) Stadium today issued a statement to the effect that, following accusations that skipper Cesc Fabregas spat at Hull City assistant manager Brian Horton, AND at kraut carrot-cruncher Michael Ballack in a game against Bayern Scrunchen four years ago.

"Cesc Fabregas did not intentionally spit at anybody," an Arse suit announced. "He is a nice Spanish boy who unfortunately happens to suffer from hyperactivity of the salivary glands. He has problems with his dribbling. And his dress sense."

"Zis is true," manager Arsene Wenger added. "Ze boy has terrible problems with over production of saliva. He drools all ze time, like El Hadji Diouf. Although I have not yet seen it. I did see Diouf spit at the Celtic supporters though and thought it fucking disgusting.

"Cesc, I didn't see, but there are medical reasons. Trust me."

Oh no, moaned this author. I spelt Djiouf wrong didn't I?

Oh Bollocks...

More as we get it

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more