Paul Gascoigne, the ex-Newcastle United, Tottenham, Lazio Burnley, Boston United and England midfielder is to sign for Premier League newboys Hull City, and will be henceforth known as 'Amber Gascoigne'.
The name is an amusing take on that of the former host of the TV quiz show University Challenge, Bamber Gascoigne, whose hilarious catchphrases were "Your starter for 10" and "No conferring". Gazza has never been to University, but once lived near someone who had.
The troubled star has struggled lately against alcohol-addiction and insanity, but Hull manager Phil Brown says that the jovial and fun-loving Gazza is just the sort of player he needs to organise his midfield, and provide some comedic pranks and other such dressing room antics.
Said Big Phil:
"Aye, 'e's a canny lad, is Gazza. 'E drinks a bit too much, like, but the lad's promised me 'e won't touch a drop whilst 'e's out on the field."
