Written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 25 June 2007

image for Manchester City Takeover Money Is Clean, Says Accountancy Fellow
Thaksin Shinawatra tips stewards at the stadium

The takeover bid for Manchester City by former Thai Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra is completely above board, says the man who brokered the £81.6million deal.

Keith Harris, once a ventriloquist and now executive chairman of Seymour Titts Investment Bank, told BBC Five Live's Sportslies programme:

"The money to be used to buy Manchester City is clean. Spotlessly clean. I know this because I helped to launder it myself."

Manchester City directors, like the Thai authorities, have reservations about the source of Mr Shinawatra's wealth, but Orville's ex-handler reassured them:

"The money has been transferred to the UK through many companies that are not really companies, by 'people' that do not actually exist. All is normal with this deal."

Dissenting fans at Man City point out that, although he is unable to enter his own country any more, Mr Shinawatra seems perfectly at liberty to purchase their club with 'dodgy cash'.

Harris concluded by saying:

"All cash in football is dodgy. Essentially, it's a just a matter of 'how dodgy' the dodgy cash is."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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