Tottenham And Chelsea Fans Bury The Hatchet

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 21 March 2007

image for Tottenham And Chelsea Fans Bury The Hatchet
The fans enjoying the kerfuffle

The Football Association has contacted Tottenham Hotspur after what they say was 'an unsavoury incident' during Monday's FA Cup quarter final tie with Chelsea, which the Blues won 2-1.

The FA want to know Spurs' version of events, after reviewing the video evidence proved to be inconclusive.

"The quality of the film was ropey", said Chief Executive Brian Barstool, adding "it was too blurred, and you couldn't see who was playing."

It's been alleged that two fans, one from each team, ran onto the playing surface in their underpants and confronted each other, and that England international Frank Lamppost had a punch aimed at him.
But Spurs officials refute this allegation, and Lamppost agrees:

"I thought I might get one on me", he said, "I just ducked. Fortunately, he just held out his hand and said "Well done", so that was nice.
I told him "Cheers, mate", he patted me on the cheek, and then returned peacefully to his seat. They're great fans here at White Hart Lane."

Spurs fan Terry Idd told reporters:

"I just shook his hand. He's a fine player."

Idd was followed onto the pitch by Chelsea thug John Evil who, although looking menacing with his fists outstretched, just wanted to thank the Tottenham supporter for his good-sportsmanship.

"I could see he was congratulating our player", said Evil, "and thought, one good turn deserves another. There was no malice between us - never has been, never will be. Chelsea and Spurs fans have always got on well."

The FA have recommended a lifetime ban from all football grounds for both fans, as well as others who irresponsibly laughed at their pitch invasion, but both clubs and their fans disagree.

One-time Chelsea Headhunter Harry Palmer, who is now a hairdresser somewhere, said:

"I used to bash these Tottenham slags' dad's heads in, but I'm all diffrent now, in I? Live an' let live - 'at's a ticket!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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