(UNEDITED) Professional footballers are renowned, sometimes, for their kindness and appreciation to others who cannot kick a ball as good as them. Christmas hospital visits, donating to kiddies charities, purchasing a Bentley or Rolls Royce weekly (they really need charity in these dire times).
However, superstar, FC Barcelona rebel, Lionel Messi, has taken his charitable side to a new level! During negotiations with future clubs hoping to have him as their 'replica shirt seller numero uno' he gave global tabloids, gagging to know where he will apply his trade, the following statement:
"Dear Messi adorers all over the planet, I can assure you FC Barcelona will not stop me kicking a ball, and because I am so terrific doing my job, many clubs have offered my dad, Dios bless him, a salary that will make Ronaldo's look like peanuts! I will not waste my money on Ferrari's, Maserati's, Bugatti's, or any such nonsense, I will dedicate my £1 million nicker salary per week to my own pocket!"
Messi fans went gaga at his statement, and the world now realises what a wonderful, charitable person Senor Messi is.
After leaving the negotiating table with Man City, PSG, and a couple of unknown Chinese clubs, with so much dosh they don't know what to do with it, Messi looked to the heavens, crossed his chest, and thanked 'Dios' for blessing him with so many charitable feelings...