SOCHI, Russia - President Putin of Russia says that he wants Russia to win the Olympics and he has devised what he is calling a fabulous incentive.
The Russian president told the Olympics news media that his good friend and National Director of Computers Edward Snowden came up with the idea.
President Putin said that retroactive to the start of the Sochi Olympic Games, any Russian athlete who has won a bronze medal will receive $1,000 [U.S.], those who won a silver medal will recieve $2,000 [U.S.], and for anyone who won a gold medal they will receive $10,000 [U.S.].
A member of the Netherlands press corps asked President Putin if this was legal.
He smiled, looked around, and replied, "Ah you are in Russia. I am the president of Russia. The Olympics are being held in Russia, my country. And why are you trying to stir up trouble? Are you a wayward infidel or what?"