Written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 13 June 2013

image for LeBron James Says The Reason The San Antonio Spurs Clobbered The Miami Heat 113-77 Was Because His Nose Was Itching
LeBron said that his nose itched throughout the entire game. (Photo taken by Dwyane Wade).

SAN ANTONIO - San Antonio Spurs sharpshooters Danny Green and Gary Neal combined for 13, three-pointers to help the Spurs manhandle the world champion Miami Heat.

The Spurs ended up with 16 three-pointers and set an NBA Finals record for shots from downtown as Marv Albert calls the three-pointers.

The Spurs never let up and when the final buzzer sounded they had beat the Heat by an amazing score of 113-77, which is the third worst blowout in NBA finals history.

The men in silver and black beat the boys from The Plywood State as if they were a Junior College team from Rhode Island.

After the game Sporting Chance Magazine's Hercules Confetti spoke with LeBron James and asked him what in the wide, wide, world of sports happened to him and his Heatless team.

James, who has about as many excuses as he has nose hairs, shrugged his shoulders and said that he just wasn't feeling right.

When asked to explain he said that all throughout the entire game his nose was itching.

He also added that the air conditioning was too cold, the smell of popcorn was overwhelming, and the Spurs cheerleaders were cheering too loud and it upset his concentration.

James also said that when the entire AT&T Arena started humming the Heat's "Seven Nation Army" song it really confused him and he had a real hard time remembering which basketball net was the Heats and which one was the Spurs.

SIDENOTE: When Confetti asked LeBron if the rain bothered him he grinned, paused for a moment, and replied, "Yeah, now that you mention it brutha, it did bother me quite a bit."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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