No Prisoners Taken By Miami Heat

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Sunday, 29 April 2012

"Back to the drawing board," chimed one hapless New York Knickerbocker, Barron Davis who began to look like he was Barren of Gray Matter.

Yes, the Heat burned the Knicks in a way that is unexpected even in playoff season. We could almost hear the ghost of Marilyn Monroe, singing: "We're Having a Heat Wave."

After watching a close game at 30-29, the fans were treated to the kind of massacre that has rarely been seen in history. Suddenly the game was 63-31, and someone told General Custer that the marauders weren't quite done.

At half time the Knicks looked like a candle melted down to pile of hot wax by the microwave Heat.

LeBron James looked like a man who has been reviled once too often.

If throwing in the towel was an option, the coach of the Knicks would have thrown in fifteen white towels: one for each white feather the Knicks team kept in their back pockets.

Fans could accuse the Miami Heat of using nerve gas against all the conventions of NBA warfare. The Knicks were a ninth grade chemistry set being blown up by MIT nerds.

Scarlett O'Hara became the rallying point for the Knicks as we could hear her words echoing, "Tomorrow is another day."

Alas, the fans were saying, "Frankly, my dear, we don't give a damn."

It was all over, and the New York fans did not even have the solace of noting they had lost their best players to injury. The only injury seemed to be hurt feelings.

Of course, Carmelo Anthony claimed in a postmortem press conference that this was part of the New York strategy of playing 'rope a dope.' Indeed, the media had roped a dope, but he was the one giving losers a rationale.

Next time we hope the refs will call the game because of dirty shame.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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