Written by Danny Williams

Sunday, 1 April 2012

image for Jeremy Lin's Knee Has "had it"

In an interview with ESPN's Michael Breen Saturday, Jeremy Lin's left knee announced it's decision to suspend any and all rigorous physical activity on the part of its host in an attempt to "put some chill on all the 'Linsanity' bullshit."

"Seriously, man, I've had it," Lin's knee said. "Who hasn't?"

In spite of all protestations from a clearly agitated New York Knicks team - including point guard Baron Davis, who rightly pointed out the burden such a move would place on him personally - Lin's knee could not be persuaded to reconsider.

"You think I don't know they're pissed? Shit, I know they mad. But I can't let that affect my decision. This isn't about them. It never has been, as far as I'm concerned."

Asked to elaborate, Lin's knee would only sit in disgust and say, "Man, screw those guys. If Stoudemire can throw it in, why can't I?"

When Jeremy Lin was asked directly how he felt about his knee's decision, he looked around nervously, and mumbled, "It's not up to me--"

"I'm down here, Mike." Lin's knee interjected. "If you want to talk to somebody else, then go get somebody else and I'll get out of your way. But where I go, Jeremy goes. Got it?"

Breen quickly apologized and asked Lin's knee when it thought it might return to the game.

There was a long, awkward pause at that point, until Lin's knee finally replied in a slow, sinister tone, "I guess we'll just see about that, won't we, Mikey? I guess we'll just see..."

At that point, Lin stood up unexpectedly and hobbled out of the studio.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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