Secret to Ryan Giggs's success: SEX!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Sunday, 26 February 2012

Hey!

The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Secret to Ryan Giggs's success: SEX!
It was obvious Ryan Giggs would be a super-hero and a sex-bomb, ask fellow Welshman Tom Jones!

The amazing Ryan Giggs continues to confound his critics, biology, the footy world, Sir Alex Ferguson - in fact everybody who loves soccer!

He has just completed 900 games for United, a feat which will never be surpassed, and still keeps popping up with crosses and goals that save Man United's neck.

Giggs has more energy than all of the youngsters at United put together (proof of that was the United v Ajax Amsterdam game).

After just witnessing Man City fans burning and hanging effigies of him outside of their very blue pubs as he scored the late winner for a pretty ordinary United against Norwich, it is time to hail Sir Ryan (if you're a United fan).

After the game, Giggs was asked by a disappointed (and very young and beautiful) female reporter from the Norwich Times what his secret is to his phenomenal longevity. He answered: "Meet me at the local motel after the game and I'll divulge all of my secrets!"

The reporter was last seen powdering her nose and heading towards The Very Sexy Lingerie Shop on Fenton Street. (Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more son.)

Arise Sir Ryan and long may you run the socks off of your wannabee, much younger, competitors and long may you keep enjoying the secret to your phenomenal stamina.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more