Chelsea Spared By Pompey - Not Next Time, Says Fan

Funny story written by Ellis Ian Fields

Monday, 9 January 2012

image for Chelsea Spared By Pompey - Not Next Time, Says Fan
Ungrateful so and so...

Chelsea's victory over Portsmouth in the third round of the FA Cup yesterday has been welcomed by a Pompey fan, though he is disapppointed by the London club's behaviour.

As we reported on Saturday, Fratton Park 'superfan' Jake Seaport asked his heroes to 'go easy' on the West London club as he felt they needed a lift.

"Well, I fought ve ledz was brilliant on Sunday," said Mr Seaport, 47, of North End, Portsmouth. "But them Chelsea mushes behaved very badly.

"We played well enough to make it look loik we wasn't just letting them win - and 1-0 after 48 minutes was all roight. We could've all gone home happy - we'd done 'em a favour, they was still in the cup and we could just concentrate on the league.

"But no... they decided to make it it four after our ledz decided to ease off the gas a bit. Bastards!"

Mr Seaport added that he was getting tired of Pompey helping Chelsea out.

"We let 'em win the cup in 2010... we'd already won it in 2008 and they looked so upset at the thought of not having it.

"But after yesterday's let dayn we won't be doin' them any favours next toime!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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