There were 21 spoof news snippets published in March 2020. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get all the news snippets from a day in this month.
CAR FART OVERALLS - PROTECT YOURSELF!
Turns out it's not about being a gas bag, after all....
written by Madame George, 05 March 2020
TESLA FARTS - UNLEASH THE CLOUD
"I thought someone had zapped me with a cattle prod", said a marketing rep." A slightly sarcastic angel from space, sent to save us all from ourselves....again? Go, World Peace.
written by Madame George, 05 March 2020
TESLA FARTS - UNLEASH THE CLOUD
"I woke up in the middle of the night, and thought someone had zapped me with a cattle prod", said a marketing rep." A slightly sarcastic angel from space, sent to save us ...again? Go, World Peace.
written by Madame George, 05 March 2020
Marines black ops coverage by Alien Sphincter Symbol
Recent reports indicate sightings of sphincter imprints - or kissy face lips - on airport windows, along with bug nappings. Officials worry there may be someone shouting "kiss my ass" silently.
written by Madame George, 05 March 2020
Barium Alert averted
Relieved chemical societies have once again been allowed the symbol for barium on the Big chart. Law enforcement reps explain the psych assessment had been over-rigorous. They now spell relief _ p-o-o.
written by Madame George, 05 March 2020
Boris caught out again
Enormous amounts of toilet paper rolls have been found at the rear of Number 10 Downing St. PM Boris Johnson denies he has been hording the rolls because of corona virus threats. He JUST needs it.
written by whatinthe world, 06 March 2020
Donald's weird threat
US President Donald J Trump has asked that all Americans donate money to his re-election campaign. Failing that, he will burn every supermarket in the country as a reprisal for people refusing.
written by whatinthe world, 06 March 2020
Sweden goes underground
The entire population of one small Swedish town have literally gone underground by reverting to subterranean dwellings built especially in case of a pandemic. Yes its back to the caves for these guys!
written by whatinthe world, 06 March 2020
Lizzie Warren Looks for Dough to Pay the Furies Tab
It's payday for Femi-Furies, whom Lizzie hired to stalk, harangue, and bedevil Bernie-Bros to the point of choking on their weed-breaths. She'll cash in 401Ks, funded from her "Capitalist Law" era.
written by Trinculoman, 06 March 2020
Elon Musk wins Recording Contract
Pacemaker recoverees worldwide are thrilled now that "Don't Doubt Yer Vibe" is part of many "get up and go" dance rehab programs for open heart surgery patients. "It's got a good beat!" said one.
written by Madame George, 10 March 2020
Coronavirus Health Tip of the Day
When leaving home, carry a small butane torch and several spare fuel cartridges. This way, when you need to open a door, you will be able to heat the handle to a dull red color before touching it.
written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw, 11 March 2020
50-Year Old Canadian Music Awards Show, The Junos, Cancelled Because Of Coronavirus Fears...
...99 % of Canadians ask, "What are the Junos?"
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 12 March 2020
Trump Tests Positive For Covid-19 Denial...
...Symptoms include shutting eyes tightly, sticking fingers in ears, and going, "NA-NA-NA-NA-NA!!!"
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 13 March 2020
Stores Around The World Report Consumers Are Hoarding Numerous Rolls Of Toilet Paper...
...prompting fears from farmers about a shortage of toilet paper crops.
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 14 March 2020
Trump tests Negative After Taking Nasal Coronavirus Test...
...however, doctors instead found over 20 kilos of cocaine up there.
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 16 March 2020
People Misunderstand The Concept of 'Social Distancing' re. Coronavirus...
...you're supposed to STAND 6 feet away from someone, not DRIVE 6 feet away from somebody's bumper, you dumb tailgaters!
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 16 March 2020
150-Foot High Border Wall Appears Overnight Across American/Mexican Border...
...Mexican President says they built it themselves because, "You Americanos can keep your Coronavirus to yourselves! Suddenly, the drug lords and murderers down here don't seem so bad!"
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 17 March 2020
Wash your paws
Washing your paws is recommended by Dr Fucini for getting rid of COVID-19 at PETA's request.
written by mikewadestr, 18 March 2020
Social Distancing
My wife and I found the perfect way to social distance: Walk in graveyards. It puts six feet between you and everybody else, and it’s highly motivating.
written by Matt Birkenhauer, 24 March 2020
Study: COVID-19 Still a "Pretty Tight" Name
Recent polling shows general disapproval of the new corona virus outbreak, though, to many, the name itself does sound "pretty tight".
written by Larry Leibowitz, 25 March 2020
Doctors ask astronauts on the International Space Station to social distance themselves and go into self-isolation...
...Station is now orbiting Neptune.
written by Stefano M. Stefano, 26 March 2020
