Camels are to blame
Camels are being held responsible for climate change affecting global temperatures. Camels emit methane every time they chow down on a Big Mac or cheeseburger. They could be banned from Maccas, yes?
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Trump has had enough
President Trump today confused the word "fuck" with truck when he said that he had had enough of the impeachment inquiry, and wanted to "truck off for a while to the Florida everglades". What the truck!!
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Tiger's warning to kids
Golfer Tiger Woods says that children collecting all his stray golf shots will be punished in eternity by being made to watch all seven of his major wins. You have been told, Charlie Brown!
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Ed and the preacher
Singer Ed Sheeran has declared himself to be the second coming of Elvis Presley. When questioned by a Church of England rector if he was confusing identities, Ed ran for the nearest heart break hotel.
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Minogue's new gender
Pop diva Kylie Minogue has refuted claims that she is a female, and says she identifies as "a spirit dweller of the Amazons". Minogue once even claimed to be the reincarnation of Elvis but then relented.
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
ISS in new laughing record
Astronauts on the International Space Station have broken the world record for the longest time laughing in one moment. Apparently, a Russian laughed for 237-and-a-half minutes after telling a joke.
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Trudeau banning black
Justin Trudeau, recently reelected as Canada's PM, wants to introduce laws banning all black animals from appearing in public lest the citizens feel insulted by their brazened behaviour. Great Scott!
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Trudeau back as PM
Justin Trudeau has just been returned as Prime Minister of Canada. Now he wants to introduce permanent laws banning blackface impersonators from performing in public. Guess he learnt his lesson.
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Kim fed up with candidacy
After concurrently announcing running for Presidents of North Korea, Cuba and Armenia, Kim Kardashian has withdrawn her candidacy on health grounds. Insanity is a problem in her family, one supposes.
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Kim running for Cuba
Kim Kardashian has announced she is running for the Presidency of Cuba. Once someone tells her about the history of this communist state she might have second thoughts. Pull the other one, Kim!!
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Kim wants the North Korean Presidency
Kim Kardashian has announced she is running for the Presidency of North Korea. However, no one has had the heart to tell her that such an attempt is impossible given its present totalitarian state.
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
Kim running for Presidency
Kim Kardashian has announced she is running for President of Armenia. The cosmetically-enhanced individual wants to be an all-powerful head of state, and to outlaw freedom of speech. Give it your best, Kim!
written by whatinthe world, 23 October 2019
