Written by Gail Farrelly

Monday, 27 December 2010

image for Twitter Birds Hounded by Bad Weather and Holiday Traditions
A Twitter birdie leaving for work.

It wasn't a fox that hindered their progress. Nor did they stop for a long holiday lunch. No siree, it was the WEATHER that made things difficult for the twitter birds this past weekend.

Bill Twitter, chief Twitter birdie, confirmed an average of half-hour delays in tweet delivery but said this really wasn't bad considering the rain, sleet, snow, and extreme cold that plagued so many different parts of the world. He also reported, exclusively to a Spoof investigative reporter, that Santa and his reindeer traveling around the world on Christmas Eve night didn't help things at all.

"The guy's a road hog," Mr. Twitter complained. "That Mr. Claus thinks the skies belong to him alone on Christmas Eve night. There's no consideration at all for the rest of us, trying to do our jobs, just as we do every single day and night of the year." Twitter also whined about Rudolph, saying "Everybody on earth is happily singing that cute song, Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer. But it's the Twitter birdies who have to maneuver around that damn red nose and the glare it creates in the sky. A big nuisance."

But on a positive note, Bill Twitter said he was happy that Christmas was over for another year. And if there's a break in the weather, timely delivery of tweets should return. He gave a little shrug with his tiny wings and chirped that we really need to remember what Kin Hubbard once said: Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in a while, nine out of ten people couldn't start a conversation.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Twitter

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