Blog gets read

Written by Jimbo Gunn

Friday, 8 October 2010

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image for Blog gets read
(Erm, I said blog not blog. You're fired)

The Twitterati whipped themselves up into a frenzy this afternoon after a blog got read.

"I got a hit!" Tweeted the blogger, excitedly. "And it wasn't from my family, Twitter followers nor anyone from my local group therapy session either!" ... ... "lol!!!"

"OMG!!!!!" replied one of his twitter followers. "Does that mean someone actually reads our shit?!" ... ... "lol!!!"

Within minutes a swarm of followers set to work trying to trace what could be the first person to ever read a blog through independent choice.

"He's not in the UK!!" Exlcaimed another twitterer after the blogger managed to retrieve the IP address of the unidentified visitor from the logs held by his web server. "O. M. G. !!! :-))"

Eventually the reader was traced to a small town called Mountain View, about 30 miles south of San Francisco, CA. Little more could be established about the reader other than his online handle "googlebot".

After 3 minutes the national press picked up on the excitement buzzing around Twitter, mainly because nearly everyone buzzing on Twitter was themselves a journalist for a national newspaper.


"Rise of the bloggers threatens establishment and traditional media and promises real social change"

- Proclaimed the Guardian.

The Daily Telegraph focussed on the financial aspect with the headline:


"Bloggers could earn enough to make a living by 2018 - first stock floatation expected before 2020"

Whilst the Daily Mail ran with:


"Dangerous Sex Blogging Culture Will Lead to Rise in Teenage Pregnancies and STD Crisis Putting Even More Pressure on Hospitals, as Immigration Soars to Record Levels - House Prices Set to Tumble in Broken Britain"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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