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Funny satire stories about hysteria

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Funny story: Robber foiled by high decibel flatulence (no signs of epidemic)

Robber foiled by high decibel flatulence (no signs of epidemic)

Earlier today Sputnik International broke the news of a sensational arrest in which the culprit nearly escaped. The culprit had taken refuge behind a tree in the steep wooded terrain of an area that must remain anonymous, according to police, to a...

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Funny story: Yes, Virginia, Santa Claus Has Donned "Blackface"

Yes, Virginia, Santa Claus Has Donned "Blackface"

Richmond Va.; It took a government worker for the Department of Motor Vehicles suffering confusion with the line of succession rules in Virginia, to bring national attention to a bizarre statewide descent into madness. A peculiar rash of unsolic...

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Funny story: Last adults in the room step forward to deal with Covington boys in MAGA hats

Last adults in the room step forward to deal with Covington boys in MAGA hats

The facts are now in on the Covington boys in the MAGA hats on their trip to the Lincoln Memorial. The MAGA hat is now being studied as causing brainlock, wild eyes, hysterical convulsions, purblind news reports, plus endangering the country. T...

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Funny story: Shocking Scenes At Edinburgh Derby Also Really Entertaining

Shocking Scenes At Edinburgh Derby Also Really Entertaining

Scottish football was today reacting to the ugly scenes that marred last nights Edinburgh derby between Hearts and Hibernian which, it has to be said, were also quite entertaining. Hibs manager Neil Lennon was struck in the face by a coin thrown f...

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Funny story: Kavanaugh, Ford and others to undergo “I don’t remember” testing analysis re bio records at under twenty something

Kavanaugh, Ford and others to undergo “I don’t remember” testing analysis re bio records at under twenty something

Chairman of the Judiciary Committee, Senator Grassley of Iowa, announced today that additional to testimony next week in the Kavanaugh affair, special memory testing procedures have been initiated. Not the same as lie detector testing, the new mem...

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Funny story: Stormy Daniels on the President’s appendage in exclusive interview

Stormy Daniels on the President’s appendage in exclusive interview

Investigators were able to speak to Ms. Daniels yesterday on revelations that may play a vital role in the upcoming midterm elections. That is,Ms. Daniels has declared there is some abnormality in the President’s physiology, possibly indicating he...

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Funny story: Comey diagnosed with NDCR syndrome as doctors warn of new virus and spreading epidemic

Comey diagnosed with NDCR syndrome as doctors warn of new virus and spreading epidemic

Former Director of the FBI James Comey has been hospitalized and isolated in a special care facility in Washington, D.C. He is diagnosed with a severe outbreak of the new virus NDCR, particularly virulent this summer. This facility remains cla...

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Funny story: Twitter promotes new Product - Twitter Twatter Weaponised Hysteria™

Twitter promotes new Product - Twitter Twatter Weaponised Hysteria™

Twitter today proudly announced a new product today that they believe will give them the edge on Zuckerburgs Face Space Fake News capability. Twitter management have been concerned recently with falling revenues and saw the success of the other guys...

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Funny story: 2017: The Mushroom Age Is Here! - World Media Promise You News Yet To Happen

2017: The Mushroom Age Is Here! - World Media Promise You News Yet To Happen

Today the world's media gathered, all seven elderly Caucasian men, to discuss headline news which "will happen" in 2017. The seven, representing 98.3% of the planets mainstream news' outlets, met at Chappaqua, New York in a palatial summer resid...

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Funny story: Trump's 'OOMPA LOOMPA' Tweet Causes Mass Hysteria - Opinion Divided

Trump's 'OOMPA LOOMPA' Tweet Causes Mass Hysteria - Opinion Divided

Donald Trump caused a global media frenzy over his latest tweet, "OOMPA LOOMPA DOOMPETY DOO", leading to Martial Law being declared in eighty countries overnight. With DEFCON II about to be formally declared, mass civil unrest and hysteria seems...

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Funny story: New products for Ebola scare proposed plus additional restrictions and theories

New products for Ebola scare proposed plus additional restrictions and theories

A new company named KRAP Inc. has stepped forward to take action in the Ebola crisis. KRAP Inc. (Kaci Risks and Preventions) maintains it is responding in the spirit of Salem in the 1690's, Senator McCarthy in the 1950's, and the anthrax scare on...

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Funny story: Halal tap water causes outrage

Halal tap water causes outrage

First it was Subway that was selling halal meat, then Pizza Express, now it turns out halal produce is everywhere, including the water coming out of British taps. "This is an outrage," said Nick Farage, head of UKIP. "Why isn't this on the news?...

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Funny story: Top of the Mandela-Tribute Pops

Top of the Mandela-Tribute Pops

Greetings pop pickers. What follows is a chart rundown of the most used soundbites of which politicians, attempting to outdo each other with, and EVERY media outlet, attempting to shape our opinions with, have utilised in their gushing application of Sainthood to a man who never wanted to be considered a saint because he and no one is. He was however, a great man. (d'oh) 10. Great Man 9. Ma...

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Funny story: Don't Ever Say the @*#*!-Word to Me Again

Don't Ever Say the @*#*!-Word to Me Again

I understand that two people will fight, especially when they've been together as long as we have. But to take such a low road by using the @*#*!-word is just too much. How can you not remember that the last time you said @*#*! to me, I left you for more than a week? All I can take away from your use of that word this time is you want me to leave you. Is that it? Because if it is, you should just...

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Funny story: Giant Rodent Infestation Causing Anxiety In Florida

Giant Rodent Infestation Causing Anxiety In Florida

A central Florida community has launched citizen patrols after reports that giant sized rodents had been spotted in several locations, striking fear into the hearts of townsfolk. The first sighting of the massive rodent, which some described as 'h...

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Funny story: Princess' Pregnancy Pissing off Paupers

Princess' Pregnancy Pissing off Paupers

As the joyous, wonderful, life-affirming and hugely significant news broke of the Duchess of Cambridge's pregnancy, it emerged soon after that the general public really could not give a flying fuck. Or a grounded one for that matter. Media coverag...

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Funny story: Jets Scrambled As Passenger Unfastened Seat Belt To Use Bathroom

Jets Scrambled As Passenger Unfastened Seat Belt To Use Bathroom

Six F-15 fighter jets were scrambled yesterday to escort a transatlantic flight diverted amid a passenger's suspicious behaviour, say US officials. The plane was due to land in Miami, Florida, but was sent over 5000 miles away to San Diego. The...

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