Written by KendoMonkey

Thursday, 27 May 2010

image for Man, version 2.0 - man created with ten opposable thumbs
Darwin once ate 28 pounds of peanuts. True story.

Scientists today unveiled what they described as evolution's "next step" - a person with no fingers but instead with 10 opposable thumbs.

The man, or "man two-point-oh" as he likes to be called, was created as a fully-grown 30 year old, complete with a knee injury he tells me would have been sustained in his youth, had he had one.

"Yes, I'm Man 2.0. I am the next step - if opposable thumbs are one step which separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom, then I truly am a God to you people."

Mark Crieg, science advisor for NASTA, the association that has created Man 2.0, said:

"It's an important leap in our own evolution, an inevitable one in many ways - we just got there first. I mean - this guy can grasp things like nobody's business! It's really remarkable. I cried when I saw him.

"The most fun we've had so far is playing thumb wars. You know how some Chess Grand Masters can play ten games at a time? You should really see this boy go at thumb wars."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: evolution, Humans

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