Science Admits Evolution Theory Wrong

Funny story written by Bullshot Bill

Saturday, 15 May 2010

image for Science Admits Evolution Theory Wrong
Dr. Feelgood; "I knew it all along.".

Scientists at the WITSALTA convention in Denver, Colorado, U.S. of A., today agreed that the theory of evolution has been debunked (that doesn't mean kicked out of bed,.... although?).

Delegates to the WITSALTA (What Is This All Stuff Leading To Anyway) conference, organised by The Church Of We Are Right (COWAR), heard a detailed explanation of the fact (not theory) of Intelligent Design, and had no option but to cede the major points of the argument. While conventional science could only offer reason, facts and observation in support of evolution theory, COWAR experts presented conclusive evidence which showed that someone up there did it.

Some of the facts tendered by COWAR were irrefutable, including, but not limited to; how does evolution theory account for the following:

Birth defects
Aids
Cancer
Hate
War
Flood
Famine
Earthquake
Storm
Poverty
Disease
Greed

Can science prove that these are simply random act of nature? If not, then whence did they come? COWAR contended that the lack of scientific knowledge of the origins of these phenomena proves that they are the acts of a loving God. Palaeontologists attending the conference were reminded that Satan had planted all fossils on the Earth to confuse the mind of man, so that no truth could be extrapolated from these records, and confirming that the Earth is only 4000 years old. DNA records were also proven to be worthless when it was pointed out that DNA stood for Devil's Nasty Alternative.

Christian Fundamentalists attending the Conference say that they had no unique input into the outcome, but rejoice in the fact that they have always been right.

Dr. Jeremiah Q. Feelgood, Covener of COWAR, said in an interview after the Conference; "Mffgfnsattr horetdsscja nhs whhhdsw". Dr. Feelgood's statement may have had more impact if his hesd hadn't been so far up his arse.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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