Professor I Burns of Edinburgh University has hit back at scientists who claim that the main cause of Global warming is the heat from Fish & Chip Shops. He said that the real cause of Global warming is the fact that most houses now have central heating.
Years ago people used to get up in the morning absolutely freezing and have to wait until coal was put on a fire and then the long added wait of having to wait until the coal fire heats up. Now some people keep central heating on all the time others set a timer for about an hour before they get up so that when they get out of bed they have a house that is absolutely boiling hot.
Professor Burns was boiling mad and in a fiery outburst he shouted out "Think about it the heat of all the houses in the land overheated by central heating THE HEATS GOT TO GO SOMEWHERE"