Los Angeles - (ReUterus): Forensic gynacologists are studying the DNA of Michael Jackson's two elder (sic) children Prince Michael I and Paris Katherine after polygamy nutter Warren Jeffs' sperm tested positive.
The jailed fundamentalist is believed to have donated copiously to IVF donor programs during his cash-strapped early twenties.
Singer Jackson himself once supported sperm banks but became heavily overdrawn after reckless spending binges.
Decades of drug abuse and the wearing of ridiculously tight-fitting trousers left him sterile, impotent and incapable of reproducing himself without the aid of cloning technology.
A spate of human growth hormone jabs robbed him of his head hair, teeth and most of his sexuality.
Deborah Rowe is one big fibber.
