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Funny satire stories about Creationists

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Funny story: Creation Scientists Teaching Snakes to Talk

Creation Scientists Teaching Snakes to Talk

Having definitively proven the scientific accuracy of the first two chapters of Genesis, researchers Christian Fisch and Ina Diaz of Liberty University are well into a research program designed to validate the accuracy of chapter three. "Even the secular evolutionists know that snakes have vestigial hip bones", declared Dr. Fisch. "This proves that they were capable of walking on two or four l...

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Funny story: Creationist Scientists Say Big Bang Happened 5,000 Years Ago

Creationist Scientists Say Big Bang Happened 5,000 Years Ago

Xanadu The Creationist Scientist League announced during their annual convention today that they have come to an agreement that the Big Bang actually did occur, but it was actually just 5,000 years ago and resulted in a big garden with a couple of tr...

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Funny story: US Creationist nuts target Pope for refusing to sell his Exxon shares

US Creationist nuts target Pope for refusing to sell his Exxon shares

New Jersey - Right wing fundamental Christian morons whose creed denies the existence of fossils have written to the Pope urging him to burn his fossil fuels portfolio. The Highland Park, New Jersey-based GreenFaith organization said today it has...

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Funny story: Holy cow! Texas Creationist nut teaching kids about 'Comet Bison'

Holy cow! Texas Creationist nut teaching kids about 'Comet Bison'

Texarse - A Professor of Cosmology at the George W Bush First Creationist Academy of Crawford has warned students about the dangers of stargazing at incoming 'comet of the century' Comet Bison (sic) as it sashays into its Thanksgiving and Hanukkah ca...

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Funny story: Happy 2013? I Prefer Not To.

Happy 2013? I Prefer Not To.

It seems the Mayans were wrong. The world will keep traveling around the sun, or the sun around the world if you're a Fundamentalist. But this most recent apocalypse averted got me to ruminating, as is my want, about New Year's Eve and all the weight that is arbitrarily attached to this one night's passage of time. It took me back to last New Year's Eve and a question asked me, "What's your resolu...

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Funny story: Intelligent Design Adherent sues the Intelligent Designer

Intelligent Design Adherent sues the Intelligent Designer

Karl Mankini of Rotterdam has begun a legal action against his own religion for what he perceives to be basic design flaws. Mankini is a member of the Intelligent Design Cult that believes that all living things were designed to look like they loo...

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Funny story: Intelligent Design say evolution isn't science

Intelligent Design say evolution isn't science

Intelligent Design, the misguided collection of anti-science collaborators, have finally laid out their reasons for thinking that evolution is not science. "Science is the constant revising of cherished theories based on new evidence that comes in...

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Funny story: Creationist archaeologists discover proof of God

Creationist archaeologists discover proof of God

In the Nevada desert, a group of archaeologists have made an astonishing discovery which appears to provide evidence for creationism. In a large dig site, the bones of ten dinosaurs have been discovered wearing crucifixes. Chief digger and creatio...

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Funny story: The world is not as old as we thought

The world is not as old as we thought

This is the shock new revelation coming from the American Creationist's Movement (ACM). According to the ACM the world is only 6000 years old. This is in stark contrast to scientists claims that the world is in fact closer to being between four and five billion years old. Scientists, (whom the ACM believe only exist as tools of Satan to disprove the existence God), have based their evidence on...

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Funny story: Richard Dawkins accused of being a yellow belly chicken sh*t!

Richard Dawkins accused of being a yellow belly chicken sh*t!

Comedian and evolution fundamentalist, Richard Dawkins, is being accused of being a big chicken, according to 'highbrow' scandal rag, The Telegraph Apparently, the normally outspoken believer taunter has refused to debate the existence of God with...

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Funny story: Evolutionists refute evolution?

Evolutionists refute evolution?

Radical reforms will be taking place shortly in schools throughout the world, due to the final acknowledgement that the theory of evolution is nothing more than a fairy tale, disturbingly, believed plausible by more adults than children. The 7 yea...

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Funny story: Fire Guts Creation Museum

Fire Guts Creation Museum

HEBRON, Ky. - A five-alarm fire roared through the recently-opened 50,000-square-foot, privately-funded Creation Museum today, leaving in ruin a place designed to change minds and rebut the scientific point of view that life on Earth evolved. There w...

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Funny story: Science Admits Evolution Theory Wrong

Science Admits Evolution Theory Wrong

Scientists at the WITSALTA convention in Denver, Colorado, U.S. of A., today agreed that the theory of evolution has been debunked (that doesn't mean kicked out of bed,.... although?). Delegates to the WITSALTA (What Is This All Stuff Leading To...

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Funny story: Quantum broadband sparks creationists animal cruelty row

Quantum broadband sparks creationists animal cruelty row

Japanese technology giants Toshiba are reported to have cracked the problem of quantum broadband by transmitting encrypted data at over 1 megabit per second along 50 kilometres of optical fibre. "The link is so secure it is 'theoretically' unbreak...

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Funny story: Creationists help kill Iraqi al-Qaeda leaders

Creationists help kill Iraqi al-Qaeda leaders

Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri Maliki is today claiming that Abu Ayyub al-Masri, the leader of al-Qaeda in Iraq, has been killed. His death was the result of an ingenious plan cooked up by American creationists and Iraqi intelligence forces. The plan...

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Funny story: Football Match to Determine Evolution or Creationism Once and For All

Football Match to Determine Evolution or Creationism Once and For All

In an effort to prove once and for all that evolution is the means of mankind's creation the Royal Society is challenging the religious community to a football match on what is billed as a neutral site; The Royal Society in London. The rules of t...

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Funny story: Georgia preacher shoots scientist over age of socks

Georgia preacher shoots scientist over age of socks

HIAWASSEE,GA--A Towns County Pentecostal preacher shot and critically injured a Nobel Prize Laureate in Paleobiology early Friday morning, claiming the man was the "Biblical Antichrist." Arrested, while holding the smoking deer rifle, was Bishop...

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