LAX to Ban All Cars Under "Trikes Only" Policy

Written by Ralph E. Shaffer

Monday, 4 November 2019

image for LAX to Ban All Cars Under "Trikes Only" Policy
The trikes will add excitement to passengers' journeys

Los Angeles, CA. Plagued by perpetual auto gridlock on both the arrival and departure levels, Los Angeles International Airport today announced that all motorized vehicles would be banned from the roads in front of the terminals. Passengers arriving or departing would have to enter or leave the airport by tricycles, available at a parking lot one mile from the airport or at the arrival terminals.

The "trikes only" policy followed a failed attempt to force cabs and ride share vehicles to pick up passengers only at a specified location. This was an attempt to keep the arrival level traffic moving. Cabbies and Uber drivers protested so vigorously, that management came up with the trike idea.

Trikes would cost the passengers nothing and would be left at the now abandoned parking garage at the airport by departing passengers, where arriving passengers could obtain one to ride back to the parking lot. Electronic monitoring would prevent the theft of the trikes. Each trike will be large enough to carry several passengers and luggage. Trike trailers, if needed, will also be available.

Cabs and ride share vehicles will pickup and drop off passengers at the outlying trike station.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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