Zurich, Switzerland. In earth shattering news, the Large Hadron Collider, owned and operated by the CERN corporation, has been blamed for, among other things, causing domesticated cats to become prematurely aroused ahead of their usual time of "heat".
An adviser for the French department of Doggies, Moggies and Other Wretches, has said that the LHC is responsible for a massive amount of feline breeding in recent years.
Apparently the LHC, by conducting atomic research into the source of matter, has unwittingly affected the "unexplainable" heat patterns of thousands of cats that populate Europe and else where. "I'm personally mystified as to how this could happen. I suggest its all a bunch of crap" said one CERN employee, who refused to be identified.
A report has been put together and will be lodged with the European Parliament in Brussels.
Critics have not ruled out drastic action being taken...against cats!!
